On looking fat but not (yet) pregnant

Girls and women are bombarded with images of what we should look like. The skinny movie stars look incredibly sexy with their big boobs and the latest fashions are flattering only for underweight women. Is it any wonder that girls, and women, suffer from eating disorders?

Before I became pregnant, it did not occur to me that I would start worrying about the way I would look during pregnancy. After all, Paris is filled with pregnant women, many of whom working and/or active. There's nothing wrong with a little bump on my tummy, I thought. So, when my body shape progressively changed—I outgrew my bras in March, my jeans began getting tight in April, and by mid-May I was no longer able to do the top button in any of my pants—I was actually quite excited. When I started looking around for maternity clothes, however, I found that my body was not yet ready for them. I realized that maternity clothes are only made to fit women who are more than 5 months pregnant. So, heeding the advice of a friend, I bought a wonderful accessory called the BellaBand, which allows me to wear my pants with my buttons undone.

The problem, though, is that when I wear my regular pants, the BellaBand, and a normal shirt, I don't look pregnant. I just look fat.

By now it has dawned on me that images of pregnant women that we are bombarded with in the media are NOT those of "typical" pregnant women. I now understand that those women who actually LOOK pregnant are those in their third trimesters—which means that only one-third of all pregnant women actually LOOK pregnant (i.e., look the way pregnant women are supposed to look). But still, it has been extremely difficult for me to accept the way I look.

It is all the more difficult for me, because I have always battled with my weight, ever since a teenager. I have struggled to keep my BMI in the "ideal" range, and have been successful in maintaining my weight within the range for the past 2 years.

So, while I patiently wait for my body to fit into maternity clothes, I have decided to do my best to accept the way I look. I have come to terms with the fact that I will probably never sport a "baby bump" such as those of celebrity women (think Angelina Jolie and Cate Blanchet on the Oscars red carpet)—but rather, I will look pregnant in my own, unique, way.